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A New School Year

I’m at drop-off and I met another dad the other day.

Please don’t ask me what my wife does.  Ugh!  Sometimes I just want to wear an “I’m Widowed” t-shirt.

And then as we introduce ourselves at my daughters curriculum night, one after one the wife or husband says Hi, I’m so-and-so, and this is my husband or wife-blah, blah, blah.  I really just wanted to say, Hi, I’m Matt and I’m a Widower.  I might let out a quiet, hmph.  The rest of the room would be “dead” silent.

But at least they’d know and wouldn’t ask “the” question.

So I keep talking to that guy and just hoping he doesn’t ask … he didn’t … phew

That day was an extra long drop-off because some bus driver lady (in an empty bus thankfully) decided to hit one car and then when moving again hit another other.  In doing so she blocked the bus my son was on and we had to wait an extra 20-some minutes before they could leave.

That dad and I kept talking for a while … one of these days i’m going to get better at remembering peoples names but I’m bad at it and I forgot his 5 seconds into the conversation.

There’s probably 60+ kids on this bus so there’s plenty more people to meet …

Then another night at a friends adult-only party (it’s nice to get out without the kids at times) I had a long conversation about Cari with one of the moms

She was super nice.  Not the in-the-face-full-of-questions type conversation some people seem to confront me with.

She didn’t know Cari but we talked a lot about her.  It was a nice conversation to have.  She applauded my efforts, like most people do, but man I’m just trying to do the right thing … and it’s not always easy.

Cari would have loved the party … it’s SO her … she would have been the party … fun, laughing, loud, joking … loving it !!!

The new year brings all this stuff up again.  New families, new kids … questions & answers.

You’d think I’d get numb to it but nope … just as hard 5+ years in.

I went on a jog after drop-off one morning.  Normally I leave it for the evenings but I was somewhat motivated.

While I’m running I’m wondering to myself what it would be like if I ever did remarry.  How I would respond to those questions.

Honestly, I don’t know how I would feel or if that would ever happen.

However, I”m optimistic that it will.  We’ll see 😉

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