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Another b-day, the day after

I’m finding it pretty hard to keep from being sad today.  I miss her more than ever.

E asks multiple times a week when is mommy going to come home.  I just don’t have a good answer.  I don’t have an answer that she really understands.

I had friends over for a kids b-day party last night.  It was as far from normal as it could possibly be.  As much as I wanted to have people over I also didn’t want to.  I didn’t want the reminder  of what we no longer have.  There was an obvious brightness missing from the room.  A life, literally and figuratively, that wasn’t present.

Today’s isn’t a happy day for me